Middlesbrough MAG's No 1 Rally

15th - 17th May

Each year Middlesbrough MAG hold their No 1 Rally and demo run and each year I turn up for the demo run then bugger off. This year I decided to take a different approach and actually go to the rally because a) I was in desperate need to go and party in a field, b) it was going to be hot and sunny.
Ash, of Darlington MAG fame, had (dis)organised a collective run out to the do on Friday night which suited me fine as it relieved me of any nagivational worries.

Eventually I found Lisa's house (even though it's only 5 minutes walk from mine) for the meet up and to collect Carol, my nervous pillion for the weekend. The ride out to the rally was fine and, in deference to Carol, slow and BMW RoadCaptain-ish.
Once on the site and tents pitched Carol and I blatted back to Stokesley to stock up on beers and stuff. Later thing progressed in the usual style including drunken conversations, suspicious chips, crap band and an antique disco, which was, despite all evidence when viewed in isolation, far better than the band.

This is one of the first sights of the day for many people
lovely, fine figure of a man, ...

Saturday started fine and got better. Carol and me decided breakfast had to be something more than chips so we pootled off to Helmsley to find a cafe. A fine cafe was found, a scrumptious breaky consumed and some twat stuck a parking ticket on me bike. The Bastards.
Be warned, even the usual trick of claiming someone has nicked you ticket won't work 'cos Helmsley now has a high tech parking system and there are no signs that they have suddenly started to charge bikes. If we are going to have to pay to park I guess this just means from now on us bikers will need to occupy car spaces when in Helmsley - one per bike of course.
Anyway by the time all this was sorted we had very little time to get back if we wanted to catch the demo run before it set off. Which is no bad thing considering ...
A safe but brisk pace was set and Carol seemed to quite enjoy it, or at least she didn't turn violent.

We caught up with the run just as it was leaving the site to head to some industrial estate prior to the run proper.
Now all this flying about had left me a little short if gas so as soon as the run set off I dived into the nearest garage. Talbot the Elder and Lisa stopped with us and by the time we set off again the run had disappeared. In an attempt to catch up we did the usual dancing through traffic routine and then big handfuls once out of town. Several miles down the road it gradually dawned on us that the run must have taken a different route and we where now ahead of them.
About an hour later they caught up with us at Redcar.

Speeches where attempted using a police car's P.A. system but it seems word other than "your nicked" don't transmit so it was all a bit of a waste. Ahh well, we all know the issues, preaching to the converted and all that.

Shall we head straight back to the site? Shall we bollocks, lets go for a ride down the coast. Chris the postee joined us on his GSXR400 and took us for a magical mystery tour of some incredibly twee places till we eventually reached Helmsley from where we sedately proceeded to Stokesley and then the rally site.

Back on the site it's still hot and sunny and everyone's getting into the party spirit. The odd dose of engine screaming, some guy starts doing some impressive wheelies on his trike and then a rally virgin. The best one I've seen yet. They crucified him. The slightly resigned expression of the poor sod was an absolute classic.

... with friends like these ...

Afternoons, drifts into the night and the party gets into full swing. A N Other Blues Band played a ... R&B gig. We sat outside the beer tent, drank beer and talked bollocks. Eventually I go to sleep with the sound of somebody thrashing the nuts out of his engine.

Great day.
Good weather, good food, good day's riding and a good party. Life don't get much better. Well done Middlesbrough MAG.