It was one of those days at work looked like it would never
stop. the proverbial one thing after another. God I need a
holiday.
Andy and Jo arrive at Durham in time for tea and lots of beers,
by the time I'm shit faced I know I'm on holiday.
Ahh, Glencoe
After breakfast we stick back onto Jo's bike all those bit at
fell off on the way up, replace bulbs and count the wheels - you
can't be too careful.
Then in the blazing sunshine we set off towards the gorgeous A68.
In a fit of wild optimism I put on my new leather jacket and
shades.
By the time we get to Carter Bar it's getting cold so I crawl
back into my touring jacket. By Peebles, where we stop for lunch,
it's cloudy enough to wave bye-bye to the shades and by the time
we approach Glasgow we're in full waterproofs.
Welcome to Scotland.
Although I still enjoy the ride up into the highlands Lindsey is
a little less impressed, in fact by the time we get to the Green
Welly Shop she is distinctly pissed off.
We wait for Andy and Jo then set off towards Rannoch Moor and
Glencoe. We keep encountering dry patches over the moor and into
Glencoe and for the final few miles to Glencoe Village there is a
distinct dry line appearing. Perhaps this is a good sign.
... and with roads like these ...
The house, Outspan - don't ask why, fucked if we know - is
already occupied. Morag, Joe, Martin and Eddie have been here for
some time.
We park the bikes in the drive, which consists of about 300mm of
uncompacted river stone, and help ourselves to some beer. Morag,
bless her, has done a huge shop on the way up, Joe is cooking
tonight and they have all paid for the grub.
Our mission, should we chose to accept it, is to pursued Joe to
feed us too. Martin and Joe, although both deny this vigorously,
are united not only by a love of Scotland, but by a love of money
that makes the best endeavours of both the canniest Scot and the
most careful Yorkshireman pale into insignificance.
Good grub though, well done Joe and Morag.
Eddie meanwhile has gone for a 22 mile run...
We go to the pub to meet Jo and Andy. Someone is strangling a
squeezebox while the village idiot insists every woman has a
dance with him before they are left in peace.
It's too humid, I'm in a strange bed and it's far to quite.
All this conspires to wake me up at 6:00am, as Craig has crashed
out on the sofa and is happily snoring and farting away, I go for
a walk. It's drizzling and raining but very beautiful.
After an hour or so I go back to bed.
Later...
I'm woken by Lindsey offering coffee and opening the curtains to
reveal ... more cloud. But it's starting to lift and we may be in
for some sunshine.
Eddie goes off to climb something.
Martin, Joe and Craig go off with the mountain bikes to do a
60 mile thing, later wussed out of in favour of a 20 mile thing.
Lindsey, myself and Morag the eternal pillion get onto the bikes
and go to the cafe to find Andy and Jo. They are there, along
with another couple of familiar faces, Rob and Beth, he on a
Ducati 900 and her on a Laverda 750.
We all decide on a ride together and we're off soon towards Oban
in ever increasing sunshine. The A828 is a stonking good road, we
pass a huge, expensive, exotic and very red supercar that isn't
playing, and bunch of Germans on overloaded sports bikes.
Many miles later we stop to regather a few miles outside Oban. A
police car passes us. We set off and soon we're in the traffic
queue into Oban with the police car a few cars ahead.
We are in a 30 limit with mainly double whites and the odd bit of
broken line. It is at this point Andy decides to overtake the
police car, coming back in across double whites.
After a good days thrash, chill out with a beer or two
A little later the blue lights flash, Andy pulls over and two
grinning traffic police get out. They are good natured about it
and just take the piss for a bit before letting him go.
We park up on the sea front and go for a nosey about and a coffee.
There a boat disguised as a whale in the harbour, they intend to
cross the Atlantic to raise money, we just hope the don't pass
any Russian whalers...
Back onto the bikes and away. For about two foot until my disk
lock hits the brake calliper. Morag, the bike and myself complete
a graceful arc to the road.
The disk carrier if pretty much dented but the disk still seems
straight enough so off we go. The brakes seem to work OK they
just need pumping a couple of times - weird.
The A85 provides top entertainment for all concerned. About 10
miles before Tyndrum Morag is transferred to Andy's bike to give
me a chance to check mine out to make sure nothing is about to
fall off.
The final stretch from the Green Welly Shop to Glencoe is a mad
thrash. I'm determined to catch the two Italian bikes when I spot
them about a mile ahead. It's bloody hard work but eventually
somewhere over Rannoch Moor I manage it. Then they
comprehensively fuck off into the distance not to be seen again
till much later that evening in the pub.
Once back at Outspan we sit out in the garden getting wasted
while Eddie cooks all the carnivours a salmony dinner,
fortunately I'm not hungry.
Another cloudy start to the day, perhaps things will brighten
up later.
Needless to say things didn't. Lindsey and Morag took off to
Glencoe to do some shopping, Martin, Eddie and Joe went of
running over mountains cos they're all mad and I took my camera
and went for a walk up past the Red Squirrel and assorted forest
tracks before returning to Glencoe along the road. Two points
came to mind during the latter stage of this walk, firstly the
amount of broken wing mirrors lining the sides of the road, and
secondly, cars that clog up the road when your riding don't half
seem to shift when your walking!
Back at Outspan Morag has received a message that Chico and Ann-M
are due to land about 9:00ish.
That brings things up to the present.
Lindsey and I took a walk to Ballachulish and had a pint in the
pub and a walk about.
Later ... We've been asked to move the bikes - fuck knows why -
and then later to move then again. Anyway none of this stopped me
getting pissed.
I woke up is morning to a black spiritual depression. This was
confirmed upon opening the curtains, drizzly rain and very low
cloud.
We walk down to the campsite to see Andy and Jo, they're packed
up and ready to move on, possibly towards Skye, but promise to
return for a party on Friday.
Morag and Martin have had a tiff, something to do with a
cornflake, which results in Martin stomping off up a hill and
Morag, Lindsey, Eddie and I heading to Glen Nevis to walk up to a
waterfall. It is an interesting little walk with a truly
wonderful waterfall although the final bit entails either a
paddle or crossing the worlds most stupid bridge. At least to me
building something then putting a sign up saying this is
dangerous, cross at your own risk seems a little daft. Must
predate the ever so kinky CDM Regs...
Once back at the car Eddie decides to go off up Ben Nevis and
then hitch back which he promptly does.
We are back at the house by tea time ish and as by now the
weather has got it's act together I decide to go for an evening
ride.
A well midges helmet following a right good howling session
I do the same route as before, out towards Oban then Tyndrum
and back to Glencoe, about 97 miles all in. There is sod all
traffic and I hardly have to brake at all, just rolling on and
off the throttle.
Heading out towards Oban there is a perfect series of bends
through the woods, I come out of a right hander well cranked over
and down on the inside of the bike and receive a wave of approval
from a young hiker. I straighten up the bike, wave back and howl
off with a smug grin.
Across Rannoch Moor and into Glencoe I'm flying, It's one of
those special rides that you know will stay with you for ever...
The evening features food, Morag's this time, and beer.
Another wet day. In fact the soggiest yet.
Lindsey and I walked, I say walked, paddled may be a more
accurate description, up to the cafe for breakfast.
A semi-aquatic walk round the forests tracks provided some
amusement on the return journey.
Shortly after the return to the house Chico and AM emerged from
their tent and stumbled to the house. From here is was an
intellectual downhill slide aided and abetted by a visit to the
Clachaig Inn thanks to Morag's overloaded Lancia.
Morag is still reading her book with the assistance of a lexicon
of words. She maintains it's a splendid read although I suspect
that it's just a copy of "Spot the Dog and his Big Bouncing
Ball" (Ages 5-8 years), which would explain Morag's interest,
that has been fed through a thesaurus generator a few times,
which would explain both the nomenclature and the need for a
dictionary.
And people say I'm a philistine ...
Lindsey provided a stonking shepherds pie for tea - yum, yum.
snaffle, slurp, scoff, scoff, scoff, BELCH (Morag) slurp, glug etc
The rains stopped, thus ending the question whether to include
two midges in the arc.
A fine day followed, some cloud but mostly dry and sunny.
Eddie and Morag went off up a hill.
Lindsey and I rode up to Loch Ness then back via Loch Sheil and
assorted cafes. The final bit was a loop via Kinlochleven, a nice
twisty bit of road with sod all traffic - perfect.
Morag, Lindsey and I walk up to Ballachulish for a meal and b
because of all this excitement I end up getting extremely drunk.
Hic. Zzzzzzzzzz ...
Ah glorious day. Well at least it's dry and cloudy so it's
biking time.
Lindsey, in a burst of "lets do it now", kicks me out
of the house and onto the bike way before I'm ready, or really
sober enough, to do anything.
The ride to Oban is hell, my hangover has gone critical and I
almost fall asleep on the bike twice. I manage to communicate my
need for coffee and stumble incoherently into a cafe.
This works wonders and the next bit of the ride down is brilliant.
The road to Lochgilphead is a wonderful mix of fast sweepers,
straights and beautiful twisty ribbons all through the most
gorgeous scenery. Lindsey is well into her stride and, thanks to
coffee, I'm able to keep up.
Lochgilphead might not be the most touristy of towns but it does
have some stonking roads and a good cafe for a lunch stop.
From here we take the road to Inveraray and then back onto the
Oban/Tyndrum road. Apologies to all passed with some outrageous
overtaking manovours at this stage, and then subjected to it a
second time when I took a wrong turning, but it was too much fun
to miss.
The final ride over Rannoch Moor and into Glencoe is suitably
pleasant...
Later that evening Andy and Jo return with tales of mad thrashes
and floods on Skye so we all go to the pub for a meal and a few
jars.
Later, back at the house, the party starts and I crawl off to bed
leaving the rest of them to it.
A horribly early start by all concerned due to the need to
abandon Outspan by 10:00am. Me and Lindsey are about first and
off to meet Andy and Jo at the campsite. Once they have packed we
get started then stop at the cafe for breakfast.
The journey south through Glencoe and Rannoch Moor is very busy
with huge amounts of traffic. From Crainlarich we take the A85
towards Perth and Edinburgh, the traffic drops and the rains
start - not a lot just enough to spoil the fun.
Round Edinburgh with it's bizarre spiral roundabouts and onto the
A68 towards Jedbrough after which we take to the backroads for a
final scratch through Kielder and then to home.
Damn good fun even if I do say so myself.
At times the natives can be ... a little strange